Harriet Tubman - Lift Her Up!

It is time for clean up duty. The damage has been done. The Russell Simmons video that was an alleged comedy about Sister Tubman has been pulled from YouTube. I suspect there may be other copies of the video that will be posted again and again.

There are people who insist that it is their right to laugh at the video and call it funny. It is their way of fighting political correctness. Those people are not my immediate concern. 

There is a problem that we can do something about. Nothing goes away on the Internet. That damn title of the video is the most recent search engince citation containing Harriet Tubman's name.

When it comes time school children to do a search guess which item is going to come to the surface? There are currently about 290,000 Google listings for Russell Simmons, Tubman and Sex.

Do you want to be the teacher or parent that has to explain this?

Those poor kids are going to be bamboozled about Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Killer. What do you think this will do to them? Grown folks, we gotta clean it up.

Lift Her Up! 

Here is your assignment. If you have a post about Ms. Tubman that is appropriate then post it on your blog and tell two friends.

If you have a book recommendation or want to do a book review of something that you have read to your kids post it up and tell two friends.




If you know of a video NOT created or paid for by Russell Simmons that can help people understand the real deal lets share that link that up as well.

We need to push the title of the video way, way down in the search results. This is also a good time to inform the young ones that we have a history that cannot be bought with silver and gold.

You can be angry or you can do something about it.

I'll add citations and other info in this post but I can't do this by myself. As many tweets that went out about the video is that's how many good resources we'll need to flush it out.

For People that Cut History Class and Have to Get up to Speed

Harriet Tubman Humanitarian, Leader, Hero Mini Documentary

TeacherTube video on Harriet Tubman as Older Woman
Intro Video on Harriet Tubman Byway in Maryland

One hour video from the Brooklyn Museum's Elizabeth Sackler Center on Feminist Art - Author Beverly Lowry discusses her book Harriet Tubman: Imagining a Life

U.S., State and Local Government Sites

America's Story from America's Library - Harriet Tubman
National Park Service Underground Railroad Monument Page
Maryland's Harriet Tubman's Underground Railroad Byway



For Parents and School Research

Good Reads Book List on Harriet Tubman
IMDB Page on the movie A Woman Called Moses performed by Cicily Tyson
Library of Congress Harriet Tubman Online Resources
Scholastic Harriet Tubman Web Hunt
University of North Carolina at Chapple Hill - Black Abolitionist Papers about Harriet Tubman   
WorldCat Library Search of Books, Audio, Articles and other media

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Not Able to Write the Ballad of Duan Huego

I wish I could write satire. I can see Duan Huego galloping into the village; his steely eyes talking in the droopy draw-ed teenagers as he smiles at the peasant women who light up when they see him. Old spice in the noon day sun.

Yes, indeed, it could be a laugh riot. Cept I don't know how to write satire. And I don't do humor well. Still, I would kinda start out with something like:

The Ballad of Duan Huego

Imaging, if you will, the sound of a galloping horse, a mighty steed with a manly man in touch with himself. So in touch with the wisdom of the ages he is all knowing, all seeing.

Cue out of tune guitar, belching and 1/3 hand clapping.

In the little dusty brown town there are people. Some that wear belts and others that have droopy draws. Some that wear skirts and some that wear over sized peddle pushers.

I probably shouldn't pinch a bit of narrative structure from all those Saturday afternoons watching movies like A Fistful of Dollars. I probably can't do that without some attorney drooling over possible infringement.

To appropriate a saying from my UK friends, "bugger off " if any attorney is in litigation mode. I'm not writing it. 

Anyway, back to the non-story story:

I imagine that Duan Huego has come to fix the town. Not that anybody actually asked him to. The man has his public and private agendas and feels duty bound to express one or the other at the barrel of a gun.

First, he caps all the droopy draw-ed young men because, well, it is easier to dispose of young men than to deal with structural and environmental conditions that caused their pants to droop.

Sure, he could have allowed them to continue wandering around trying to find some way to support themselves but that would involve actual contact and conversation.

Duan Huego ain't got time for that. He just wipes them all out and tell the town to start again. Yes, there will be wailing and many of the town members would be upset. As Duan Huego clamps down on the Twinkie half hanging out of his mouth, he knows that sartorial appearances trump indigenous rights of existence. 

And speaking of rights, he....

Hmm. Perhaps Duan Huego doesn't have a Twinkie half hanging out his mouth. It could be a  Chocodile.  Yeah, I like Chocodiles.

Anyway, I can see him rolling and sucking on that Chocodile like a god possessed.

Duan Huego looks on as the town re-allocates money from the schools to the new sports stadium. Not sure who is gonna play in the big game seeing as how he whacked most of the local teams.

But he does support Title IX. In his wisdom, he settles in to coach the ladies basketball team.

One of the women in the town approaches him and ask if he can do anything about those laddie magazines in the supermarket. The ones that have all kind of nakedness and booblification on display at the checkout counter.

Duan Huego looks softly into the woman's eyes and tells her he feels her pain, her anguish and her frustrations of being surrounded by uncaring men in shark-skinned suits. At that very moment, Duan Huego central nervous system shifts to his inner femme.

You know, I don't think they had shark-skinned suits back in the day. Need more research on male fashions in dusty brown towns.

Other women start to approach Duan Huego and they like what they hear. They invite him to dinner, the Sunday lunch and the Fish Fry. Duan Huego doesn't do a dang thing about getting the laddie mags out of the supermarket but he talks so convincingly about the need to do so. Many of the women forget the harm that has been done by eliminating other women's male children.

They decide he is their voice; even though they have voices of their own.

One day, a woman came to town. She recognized the horse. The trail of Chocodile wrappers all up and down the street. The weeping widow whose husband ain't dead but might as well have been since she took up with Duan Huego.

The woman with no name talks to other women about what she knows about Duan Huego. They don't believe her. Some of the members of the basketball team also share that Duan Huego has been coaching a little too much in his after school workout. An elder testifies she has seen Duan Huego with a copy of T--ts and Bits while standing in the checkout.

Hang on, maybe Duan Huego is an asset dude instead of a rack man? Then again, the way he uses his tongue to get what he wants he could be orally fixated. Need to research names of straight male magazines that denigrate women but aren't violently disgusting.

The women on team Duan Huego fight for their man. Who still talks a good game but doesn't do jack. He does put the feel on Maria behind the bleachers as the game is in progress.

Maria has that kind of voice that carries so when the ref called "Foul" Maria followed up with "Oh, God, mmm, Good God Owwwwwww with the ow rhyming with foul.

That sealed it.  The woman with no name was telling the truth. As was the elder and all other women. Everybody could now see it and there was no denying it happened.

Or could it? Yes, even with evidence Team Duan Huego would not relent. Duan Huego himself did a duck and weave as he promised never to enter the stadium again. He still is gonna diddle his woman but this time in private.

No. Not a laugh riot. Not funny. It really sucks. Just like it does in real life. 

A savior by definition is someone who takes your side. Protects you. Doesn't have to be religious to save you or reflect what you believe in. There are people that groups and communities have anointed flawed people to be their spokesperson/public saviors.

Hell, we are all flawed.

And like a true love it is hard to let go of the person that you projected so much time and effort into making what you needed him or her to be. It is the real life version of Juicy Got 'Em Crazy. 

They can't let go. They won't let go. Saviors are really hard to let go of. Because it is hard to say that you made a mistake in judging a person.

The only way to let go is to be willing to listen. And step out of the comfort zone. Not many people are willing to take that chance. It is hard. There is no progress without it.

And that is where we stand at the moment. 

Cue out of tune violin, knuckle cracking and 1/4 hand clapping. Fade to Black.

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Kathleen Sebelius on Preventative Health Care Services - BlogHer 2013

Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius spoke at the BlogHer 2013 HealthMinder Day Keynote session.

In this clip, Ms. Sebelius talks about some of the preventative services available to women under the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act; often referred to as Obamacare.






Some of those services are:

An annual well-woman preventive care visit for adult women.

Contraception and contraceptive counseling: Women with reproductive capacity have access to all Food and Drug Administration-approved contraceptive methods, sterilization procedures, and patient education and counseling, as prescribed by a health care provider.

STI counseling: Sexually active women have access to annual counseling on sexually transmitted infections (STIs).

Gestational diabetes screening: This screening is for women 24 to 28 weeks pregnant, and those at high risk of developing gestational diabetes.

Breastfeeding support, supplies, and counseling: Pregnant and postpartum women have access to comprehensive lactation support and counseling from trained providers, as well as breastfeeding equipment.

For more information visit the HHS Fact Sheet about women's preventative health services.

This is one of many videos that I have recorded during the BlogHer 2013 conference. I will be uploading more clips of Secretary Sebelius keynote as time and Internet connection permits me to do so.

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Witness to a PUA Failure - My Testimony

Dear menfolk, I like you. I do. Really. Well, some of you. A specific few. Let's just say there are positive lights in the firmament of mankind. Emphasis on the kind part.

Some of y'all are doing things that make the boogie man look honorable. A small percentage of the tribe has issues that need to be work out with a therapist or six months in the wilderness with a guru.

I understand that many of you would like female companionship. Others just want a body or access to specific female body parts. We are not like a car, Ruby on Rails or a jigsaw puzzle. We are people.

The poem below is an interpretation of an experience I had on Hollywood Boulevard. I was just an observer. This is the sanitized version.

No, not really. I tried to remember word for word what the tour barker said.



Either way, you cannot go around and cuss women out because they:

• Chooses not to talk with you.
• Is totally afraid of you, your clothes or the saliva emanating from your mouth.
• Has other things to do that do not include you.

I have to say that the actual man who inspired this poem towers over most women. He is also wide, in a muscular way. Booming voice. Bull in the China shop kind of guy.

If a woman walks away from you and she is not interested,  game over.

Done.

Let it go.

You do not need to blast your disappointment up and down the street and casting aspersions on her character where 30 seconds before you were quite interested in getting warm with her form.

In conclusion, that page in the PUA handbook that tells you to annoy women to get attention? Burn that page. Well first rip out that page, burn it and stomp the ashes.

I'd tell you to burn the book but that is something I cannot promote. But should it accidentally wind up in the barbeque pit don't bother to retrieve it.

Or replace it.

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Gabrielle Bouliane Poem To Help Kick Your Butt

Almost finished with VloMo 2012. Trying to find a way to re-vitalize my other blog and make it more useful and enjoyable. I still struggle with it, trying to find the right voice.

I know I need to step up and find a new path. I know good things are waiting for me once I fight the fear and the often debilitating voices of doubt.




From up on high this is a recording of Gabrielle Bouliane, reading a poem from 2009. Her message is constant and clear.

The grim reaper snagged Gabrielle in 2010.

Get a move on and do what you gotta do.

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Is Videoblogging Passe for Women?

There are days when I feel like a loon. A loon is a strange looking bird that looks like parts of other birds. But it is a loon. Today I started a Vlomo 2012 video gallery located at http://vlomo2012.tumblr.com

I've been up since 4 a.m. That is part of the reason I feel like a loon. Yep. That's me. I feel out of sync but trying to connect. I think I'm failing. But I am not. I am just tired.

I'm still a loon. Now this does have something to do with my question. Being a loon I got to waddle to get in the water.

I loathe to define videoblogging. It gets folks antsy. I don't want to get into a semantic fight with anybody. So here are a few statement and you can pick out the one that appeals to you:

• A blog that contains a video post on a regular basis.
• A video series that is posted by an internet distribution company that allows other people to watch or post the video on their blog.
• A talking head video using videos instead of the keyboard to express their feelings.
• A person using video to express a person, place or thing and then uploads the video for others to see.

So before you get to the question of "is videoblogging passe for women" you first got to ask is it passe?

For some folks yes. And that is okay. These are the folks that have moved on to professional careers in video or media.

Or it could be that because of the time sink it can be (but does not have to be) there just isn't time after work, school, family, bathing and sleeping to cram one more thing in your day.




Or you have said what you needed to say and are done.(PS - Margaret ain't done, she's made two more videos since this one.)

But there is another group that is hesitant to try. I feel that I haven't done a good job of encouraging women to step it up and truly use video to be visible and express themselves.

I'm not giving up Create Video Notebook but I gotta find a better way to engage women and men to take advantage of this time before the gates are closed and we can't communicate with each other.

Why? Because we have foolish old men who do not understand biology. We have women being defined by men into functional boxes of utility; formally known as the kitchen and the bedroom.

That is never a good thing. Not even for men.

The menopause story has got to be told to the Boomer women. The older women needs to tell the young ones how they survived.

Should reality television be our touch post as how women behave?

Nay I say nay! (See, squawking like a loon.)

So maybe the term videoblogging will eventually go away but I hope that folks tell their stories visually once in a while.

It can be slides to narration to video.
It can be you talking in front of a camera with a memory of your favorite dress.
It can be you sipping a cup of coffee as you talk about last night.

You got a smartphone that records audio and video? That is all you need to get started.

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Light Up the Lady Bits Before It is Outlawed

When I did watch terrestrial television there the advertisement of that goofball with the giant grin would be ever present on the dial. So proud he was of stretching his tighty whiteys. 

The commercials were not exactly crude. Just a nudge and a wink to sell natural herbal kickstarters to juice up the male vascular system. No, I am not going to type the names. You know the names by heart.

Y'all know that for the past couple of years I've been advocating, quietly, to stock up on the toys and enjoyments of a female sensual nature.  It is not all I do or write about. It is a part of my life.

And your life too.

It isn't just me, there are a lot of bloggers ages advocating for healthy sexual expression (however you define it) or non-expression. It is a matter of choice. Of options to explore.

I use to think so. Until this week.

Cuz I didn't figure on the high number of biologically ignorant and stupid grown men who do not have a clue about basic biology. Men in  political power who are busy trying to legislate our control over our bodies.

Or the other ones, that think our bodies are a switch. I read something about a woman whose husband watches sports as soon as he comes home. The man does little to communicate with her during the week.

Come Saturday night he wants the bango-bango like it is his blood right.  Not the first time I heard about this and it won't be the last. Selfish brains wrapped up in a living body bag.

Enough about them. This is about us. This is a short video from Zestra using a bus analogy to why some women need a little help when they want to get busy.



I haven't used Zestra. I think I'm gonna check it out. But when I went to look at the web site video page I saw that the video viewing numbers were kinda low. Part of the reason is that they cannot get their commercials aired on broadcast and cable television.

Because broadcasters do not want to advertise a product that advocates women's active sexuality.  There is something wrong about that. But since the dinosaur of old school TV is on its way out I ain't gonna grieve all that much.

Here is the thing. I do want women to warm up their lady bits with healthy options. Like I said, I gotta test this out but more than that I want more women talking about the sexuality in our own terms.

Yes, we truly need to beat back that ignorant ish that is being pumped as taking our country back to a period of repression. 

Sexuality should not be a pain inflicting weapon (except for y'all into BDSM culture.) but the dominion of broadcasters or, more to the point, those that are casting the wishes of broads aside, needs to be broken.

Chip, chip chip away. Take them down. One way is to look at the videos.

Tell a friend. Discuss. If you buy the Zestra oil apply liberally or conservatively as your nature dictates.

My 2nd Disclaimer of the Week

Not a paid shill. I received an offer to try out a sample. I haven't decided if I will do that or just go out and buy the oil. I do want to advocate for sexual expression particularly for midlife women.  That is why I put up the post and the videos.

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You Can Learn A Lot from A Mug

I went to the Urban Dictionary because I needed a few more words for penis. Because I want to write something and there might be a penile limit to how much I can type penis.

Mugs and Shirts for Sale at Urban Dictionary

I hit the home page and the first thing I see is this citation and the option to buy mugs. I get the person wanted to make a point. I do.

I get that Urban Dictionary uses contributors to the site to help generate income and it is on auto-pilot. I'm not asking for outrage or action against anybody.

But I say unto you, the fuckers still do not get it or understand.  And as much as the concept of having those two words fused on to mugs and t-shirts irk me I have to say that the next citation just adds fuel to an already burning fire.

I didnt want to date the ho, I was just DTF

Now help me out here. Women are being told you can't have access to birth control. Can't have access to the morning after pill. Can't even be sure that if you miscarry in certain states you won't be arrested.  But plow boys can whip it out day and night. Expectation of plenty and you, female person are considered a ho if you give it up. Hypocrisy 101.

I don't know. Maybe we should go all the way back and have young men raise sheep.


We need to make it understood that rape is not a commodity to be sold. Like it is now being done politically. Like it has been done in the marketplace.

Do what you need to do, I'm just showing you a bit more of what we are up against.

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The Older Women In the Room

Well that title will scare off a bunch of people. I know my gray hair did at the conference. But that isn't the whole story. I want to tell the whole truth. I was in transit when I heard that President Obama would speak at BlogHer.

Once I got settled into the hotel, I went to a Duane Reed drugstore and bought hair dye. I was not going to be in that ballroom with the President without flashing some reddish hair. I was going to do it. Until I realized that there was no way for me to clean up hair dye in a hotel room.

I wished I had worked this out before spending $9 on Natural Instincts. Or getting the fact straight that he was doing a live video presentation from the White House.

Still, Little Miss Aging Affirmative got stuck in the hoopla of appearance phobia.

Then I went the other way. Washed and picked out my natural hair. It is gray and brown and dark brown and whatever else ancestor want to put a word in. to the mix.



It was like I opened a can of Raid or something. My friends and on-line acquaintances that knew me embraced me like a long lost friend. Newbies and those women under a certain age kept their distance.

There is a reason for that, check out the video.

I walked a lot in New York City. I saw many a woman stroll down the street styled perfectly. Young, old, trendy. They were wearing the perfection suit of invisibility. Attractive enough to approach but only if you could reach the bar of acceptance.



Time and living have raised the bar on me and I didn't know. Or want to know. I kept on walking and looking at the images of Park Avenue mannequins, the ones in the window. Alabaster white, sleek and implacable in the seller's point of view.

To be fair, there were some onyx mannequins that did little more than hold up the status of tight clothes on young ridged bodies.



Brand identity and storytelling they call it. But it leaves a lot of people out of the narrative.

My bodies story isn't being told. This is not acceptable. Really, it is not.

The video clips are excerpts from my recording of the Blogging Into MidLife session at BlogHer 2012 NYC.

Ann Dunnewold writes about aging issues on her blog at VibrantNation.com
Darryle Pollack blogs at http://blog.darrylepollack.com
Patricia Patton hangs her shingle at http://www.boomerwizdom.com

I'm working on uploading the full session, hope to have it up soon.

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Pulling Up the Big Girl Panties

In my heart, I love to travel. It is my head that gets in the way. I am supposed to be packing. Doing laundry. Confirming reservations.I am not doing these things.

I have 12 more hours and I've wasted time. I'll be fine. Once I've typed this out of my system.

Saturday I was in a department store. I turned the corner and saw these items for sale. None in my size. Not that I would wear Hello Kitty panties. I would not. Never. On this I swear.

Batgirl or Wonder Woman? Perhaps. Not that anyone has seen me naked lately but I'd have some explaining to do. Then again if I have to explain maybe the relationship is not meant to be. But if I was with a guy who wore Joker underwear I would be extremely concerned.

I am a hypocrite. And anyway, just because it was in the women's undies section who is to say those are Batgirl's panties? It could be the main Bat.  I don't want to wear Batman's underway. Love the guy but he is a little tense. Sticking with Batgirl.

I have the opportunity to see old friends. Meet new people. Learn things I do not know. Confirm that I am still here. The little kid would couldn't imaging this trip. The depressed adult that wasn't sure it was worth it to go on. The office drone that longs to bust out of the cubicle.

Here it is. This is the time. I can do this. It is okay. I can chose to eat alone or with people. I can introduce myself to the other. It has been a while since I've challenged myself.

I can do the best that I can and for god's sake not judge myself against other people. It messes with being present in the here and now.

I'm scared. In a good way.

So with this I'm pulling up the invisible big girl panties. All I need  now is a cape. Or some rocking boots.

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What Is In that Purse?

This year I'm traveling as light as possible. Which doesn't mean I'm going to BlogHer 2012 empty handed.  It just means that I'm thinking about what devices would more than one job?



Last year there was a mobile tech panel at BlogHer 2011 San Diego. Each one of the participants showed what they carried for business and personal use.

Adding up the amount of tech these ladies used in 2011 is impressive. Tablets, smartphones, camcorders and support technology.

I have held off buying a tablet. Not even the Nexus 7 could move me to do so. But I am close. I want a rear functional camera.  I have to have an SD expansion slot.

I will be visiting the Expo floor looking for my hearts desire. I might make some lucky vendor very happy. I doubt it but I can't give up the search.

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Gaby Moreno at Make Music Pasadena 2012

With the current xenophobia running rampant in this country wrapped in patriotism it is hard to make the case that we need to listen.

Think. Reason it out. It does not matter now.

Either we unite under one nation or we splinter in to a pseudo sovereign void. Not about the left or the right anymore. You can't white wash a nation. We can destroy ourselves but we can't go back.

I get tired of trying to talk to people who will not listen. And the ones that do listen are just fed up. How much more can you take in one day? You can't keep ingesting negativity.

I don't want to. Not today.



Which is why the spirits and or random DNA cells allow for music. This is just a short clip from a performer named Gaby Moreno. She was busting serious vocals at Make Music Pasadena 2012.

I was across the street at Samy's Camera getting a new memory card. I walk out the door and I hear this voice booming from half a block away.

I mosey on over to Memorial Park and there she was blending that Guatemalan voice around blues licks from some African from long ago. The ugliness, stupidity and mendacity of the world no longer mattered.

We who heard her were bound in a place of music. No ID card required. For more information about Gaby you can visit her Facebook page.

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Flipping Out on Yoga

The sun is shining bright and luscious. It is not too hot or muggy. This is my kind of perfection. The doves are cooing. The crows respond with death threats. All is right in my world.

I'm still working my way through the magazine. I  know I am in magazine land because in the table of contents they have more skinny legged young women in skirts blown with the breath of angels that cause cascading curls.

There is picture of a plate of brownies but there is a tag line about avoiding temptation. The brownies are dull, brown and unattractive.

Phflibt. I should go to Mad Magazine to look up the correct spelling.

The good news is that I am almost out the the ad copy area because there is a brown hair big ole eyed girl with caterpillars for eyelashes.  Very shiny, crystal clear peach color puffy lips.

Seriously, you can count the folds and the ridges. No cracks. No jagged bits of flesh. No teeth marks when you accidentally bite your lip.

I'm thinking her lips were shot with a Hasselblad camera. $26,000 for the cheap version and god knows how much to trick that camera into digital still perfection.  Must be a full size sensor...

Wait, this isn't about cameras. Dang it.

Moving On. 

Page 13.  Actual words that lead to stories.

Take a naked yoga class. There are naked yoga classes? I have taken yoga classes and everybody had clothes on. Even the ones that looked like their tights were spray painted on were dressed.

Not sure I'd want to do the Extended Fish pose with boobies dangling as I'm trying to balance my head and feet. And my thighs? I got dents and ridges and splotches and freckles? They move too although I wish they didn't.

And what is the etiquette when you accidentally look up and see another persons labia? 

Page 14. Men use hyperfocal thinking.  This means that their brains can only handle one task at a time.

Naw, that is not true. I've seen them eat and watch sports, eat and watch porn or eat and cuss out the guy who just cut him off in traffic. 

You just got to get their attention in between bites. No biggy.

Page 15. More caterpillars around eyes, this time laced with green sparkles.

Page 16. More women raising up their dresses to show off their shoes. They are wearing mini dresses? What is there to raise?

Page 17. The letter page. "Thank you for showing me that guys like women with make-up." Thank you for letting me know I was an orgasm virgin."  "Thank you for showing me how to dress so my date doesn't run away in horror."

I Am So Confused. 

Page 20. The survey responds that guys want to wait five dates before they have sex with a woman. Oh, hell no, somebody is lying!

This part is straight up fiction. 54% are turned on by a woman's butt. Yet none of the women displayed in the magazine have an ample fanny. Almost none of these women have bumpus in rumpus.

Words fail me. Actually, I'm still stuck on naked yoga. And the reason I am stuck on it is because I think I have a VHS tape called Naked Yoga.

I didn't buy it. I think I inherited it in a move or two many years ago.

If I remember correctly there was a mountain top, lush green lands and a man and a women doing poses starkers. This was back in the 1990s so I'm not sure if there was true nakedness or not.

The dude might have worn a diaper/thong kind of thingy. I'll get back to you.

I'm curious how they did the Downward Dog.

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Flipping Out One Page At A Time

I have this magazine in my hand. It should be thrown out, it was printed March 2011. I keep meaning to re-purpose it, re-contextualize and interpret its missives according to my view of life.  Which is a pack rat's way of saying "I'm not sure I want this but there might be some good in it so I can't take the chance of letting it go."

I don't want to mention the name. I don't hate the magazine but I'm not for promoting it either. It is easy enough to figure out with article titles of "The Most Exciting Thing You Can Say to A Man!" "How to Perfect the Sexy Pout!!" "Lust Up Your Underwear!!!"

Once a year or two I buy this mag to find out how much of a sex pot I am not. I know for a fact I don't stand in doorways and peel open my blouse to show my breasts.

Wouldn't work anyway. I wear turtlenecks. And padded bras. Because apparently you can show breasts but you cannot show nipples. Nipples freak certain people out.

July 9, 2012 is supposed to be No Bra Day. I'm all for it if I'm home but I know most of us will contract unwanted and unasked for attention if we try let our girls roam free outside.

Y'all do what you want but I'm not going to be rocking left and right in a white t-shirt down Colorado Boulevard.

I don't have a white t-shirt.

Back to the magazine.

Page two. Don't have blonde hair. Don't need the miracle hair dye to enhance my blonde coloring.

Page three. Skinny jeans. Not skinny, lean or remotely within the realm of size 6.

Page four. More blonde hair dye with puffy lips. I have the puffy lips but they came with my body which is not size 6. Do I get credit for that?

Page five. Blonde girl in sexy black dress. I'm sensing a trend.

Page six and seven. Blonde girl has hands in her hair as a bunch of make-up is displayed on the next page. Four tubes of lipstick and three tubes of foundation for that oh so natural look.

Sigh. Skipping to page 11.

Brown hair girl giving a lip lock to abdominal six pack. What a relief.

What Have I Learned?

In the first 11 pages I have learned that blond women need a lot of make-up, hair dye, skinny jeans and black dresses.

And brown hair girls wear polka dot panties and suck face.

This is a lot to take in. I'm gonna have to meditate on this for a spell.

Okay, I'm done. 

I'm going out into the real world.

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This Is Bullying and We Are Responsible

I have been trying to post to Twitter and it won't let me. It is just as well. I have a lot to say and I might have left too long a comment at Lynette Young's G+ page. I want to put in my two cents about what happened to Karen Klein.

This woman is a school bus monitor who was subjected to ten minutes of abuse by kids, pre-teens, teens it doesn't matter. The little haters let their mouths run wild and free.



I can't get past more than three minutes of it. It get's worse.

I'm going to incorporate some of my comments that I posted on Lynette's page and more thoughts as well.

I know everyone is extremely angry and rightfully so. There is no excuse. None. But who wants to take a bet that some of the little demons go to church? Get good grades? Present one face to mom and pop and another to their friends? There is a lot of stuff happening in that video. Crowd mentality, No internal filters, playing to the crowd.
 
Pre-teens and teens are not good at considering anyone other than themselves. They are still growing up. Short term thinking. If not for the video they might not even remember that they did this.

You hope the lessons parents try to drill in their skull take hold. For some parents it is all they can do to get their children to wash themselves and not stink up the room. Parents do the best they can but sometimes normal kids do profoundly stupid things.

Yes, there needs to be discipline, as in invoking a personal discipline as a life long tool, not necessarily invoked with a switch, belt or whipping stick. Empathy, which seems to thought of a sissy skill or weakness in our culture needs to be taught.

Again, in no way am I condoning what these proto-terrors have done. They need to be held accountable. Seriously accountable. Wanting to beat the snot out of them is understandable. We have a sustained culture of bullying. What do we choose to do about that?

We caused this. We allowed this. With every politician demonizing the other. With our behavior in the mall or supermarket. In our television programs, games, media we have said the other is lessor and it is okay to "beat them down."

Last week Anita from Feminist Frequency was attack by people claiming to be gamers that she had no right to voice an opinion on the female tropes in video games. To say she was cussed at would be an understatement. It was nasty.

What makes it okay to do this? What makes it okay to spew this level of hate? I don't even think hate is the right word. It is the wicked side of power and control being implemented by people who have none.

 The MarySue has a good write up and summary of what happened and the positive result.

The video below is of the real Karen Klein. She talks about the experience and you can tell her spirit operates on a much different plane. Get over the gray hair and get to the person.

Nobody should have had to have endure what she did.




I was bullied as a kid. It was hell. I do know there is a part of our culture that loves the idea of fairness and the exchange of ideas. But when you are bullied you begin to wonder what is so good about living?

Life is not easy but bullying adds a dimension of hell that is not necessary. If you can survive it (and please do) a piece of you goes into an internal witness protection program. Takes a lot to want to be around people.

Change.

It is almost a quaint notion. It doesn't have to be but we can't go on this way. This means we will need to change how we talk about politics, other people, gender, sexuality, religion.

There will be some that will state that they hate political correctness. Not talking about that at all. If I feel that you are full of shit I will continue to tell you so.

I am just saying we have to model different behaviors. We just got to.

Because I ride the bus too.

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When Worlds Intersect Is that A Good Thing?

I am a long time traditional comic book reader. Old school when ten cents got me the latest issue of Batman. I love libraries. Movies. Animation. Sex. Literacy. Reading, Creativity. And usually they are compartmentalize and each is in their own silo.

Sometimes there is an overlap. One or two intersections is okay but this...this is popping brain cells. Once upon a time eh, 1999,  there was a comic book called Birds of Prey. Later, there was a television show by that name. It didn't last long but I watched it.

No complaints. It had Shemar Moore.Why be greedy?

Soooo, I'm checking my Tweet stream and somehow wind up at Bleeding Cool where I see Birds of Prey XXX. A Parody.  This trailer is safe for work. Only words are exchanged and only one of them is heated. Can't trust that Huntress for nothing. She does drop a F-Bomb.



How? Why? Nooo!? Well, maybe. It is like the Star Trek Enterprise XXX parody. On the one hand is nothing sacred? On the other hand I have always had half a lobe to do Picard.

Which is wrong, wrong.

For the record, I have only seen the Star Trek Enterprise XXX trailer. It seems like they tried to be respectful. I have never seen any of the XXX parodies and don't think I am going to be able to for quite some time. Not high on the bucket list.

Back to the Birds of Prey. So they have Oracle in the wheelchair. Oracle is gonna get busy later and not just floating through Ethernet cables either. She is neither PC or Mac, Oracle's rig is custom built.

(Okay, quick recap on the back story: In an alternate dimension, Oracle is a later day Barbara Gordon who got the hell and the use of her legs beat out of her by The Joker. He might have done other things but that depends on the interpretation by the specific artist who wrote the book at the time.

I hate that guy. Straight up hate The Joker. Nothing funny about that damn clown.

Barbara, who was a librarian reclaim her mantle as crime fighting Information Mistress of the Digits. Then the other Birds of Prey, The Huntress and Black Canary, get to chase and capture villains and make Gotham or New Gotham a grand place to live. )

Hence, my dilemma. Oracle still a librarian fighting crime from a wheelchair (this is important for story continuity. Later on DC had Barbara walking again to resume being Batgirl. The Wheeled Sisters did not take kindly to the change).

Oracle is getting some non-combat action and it ain't with Richard Grayson. Double score. Except that she is bonking a detective in a nookie film. Let us not forget that her pop is Commissioner Gordon.

Why must I be tormented so?  I love Batman, I do. Iconic character.  But dig it, there are the comic books, the 1960s series, movies starting from the 1940s on up. Major props to the animated series. That isn't a typo. You have Batman, the Animated Series, The Brave and The Bold, The Batman, Batman Beyond not to mention all the action he's got in Justice League.

Batgirl has is third season appearances in the early 1960 Batman shows, the cancelled series and guest star shots as an adult in some of the animated series.

DC come on! This is the only full length live action movie with a super heroine. It is a movie that most people can only watch when the lights are low and the Two Buck Chuck is chilled.

So I have been told.

There should be a Black Canary animated movie. You can have Ollie (Green Arrow) in it but let the girl clear her pipes. I know you made a Wonder Woman animated movie that didn't make bizillons of dollars but I don't think you advertized the movie that well. I would have bought it if I could have found it at Target. Water over the bridge.

Dang it, forget that there are 14 to 18 year old boys for a moment. Girl people like action movies too. I am not against the action in the parody but you know what I am saying?.

What am I saying? I lost track.

I'll watch the trailer one more time just to cement that I saw it. It might be important one day. You never know. This isn't wrong. But it is just not right.

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Vlogging While Brown 2011 Panel Session Video

When the blahs hit and you think there isn't anything to conjure up I say dive into the external hard drive video shoe box and see what you got.

The Blogging While Brown Conference 2012 is happening in Philadelphia this year. I can't make the trip this year but I do have some video to share.

These are two brief clips from the Vlogging While Brown panel. The first clip talks about how to present yourself as an expert or a resource to your viewers.


The second clip talks about the need to have a thick skin when you present yourself to the viewing public.


The Vlogging While Brown Panel participants were Roshini Cope, Andrea Tasia and Lydia Cotten.

Just two quick points. There is all kinds of ways to do videoblogging. There is talking head, personal narrative, advocacy, travel, cooking,  pick a topic and somebody has done a video on it. 

You do want to put on your internal slickers to repel some the bile that could come your way.

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Searching for Auditory Pleasures Part 2

After a long day at the salt mine I get to come home and look for non-skeezy and titillating podcasts. Friends, it ain't easy but somebody has to do it. I think I was flapping my jaws about some sexually repressive outrage. Next thing you know I am trying to avoid malware and bad sex writers.

That might be one and the same thing. You can learn a lot by seeking out erotic podcasts.

I have to be careful what I listen to because it could wind up in a dream. I got plenty enough action. So much so I have a hard time waking up. Unless I am hanging on a cliff or something. You don't want to be banging somebody in a dream and then fall of the cliff.

I've done that. In real life or a dream you do not want to go over a cliff. Trust me.


There are ad free erotic podcasts. There are also the ones for sale after you get a sample listen. Sadly there is crud. For now, I'm staying on the public roads. I should mention that many of the erotic podcasts are sponsored by Adam and Eve. Nothing I can do about it except maybe fast forward.

Any more disclaimers? Yes. I am really more interested in the story and how sex facilitates telling the tale. Not really fond of the man-dang-bang kind of stories. Your taste will be different.

Where was I? Oh yeah. for our literary celebration of Masturbation Month 2012 I have found Spice, Romantic Stories of Love. This is also on iTunes which you now can do a web preview.


Sassy is the narrator. She does a good job but I think the stories are more for couples. There is a situation, a lot of description so that you have the set up in your head and then off to the races. There are about fifty stories and they don't run longer than 15 minutes.


I also found The Kiss Me Quick Erotic Podcast. This is a relatively new show but has got potential. Rose Caraway does the honors of writing and performing her work. Rose's podcast is also on iTunes. I did like her Succubus series specially episode #4 but the shorter work are a challenge for me.

I think if I was a guy I'd like them better. They are often written with a male point of view. Women can get off on a story written that way but I generally don't. Again, I do like long form storytelling so it is more me than her.

Okay that should help some of you get to sleep and you won't need a pill either.

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Discovering The Little Death Podcast

The crickets have stopped for the night. Only a strangler or two put out last call. I am in-between sleep and being awake so I reach for my music player for something to put me back to sleep.

I'm looking for something different. I came to this podcast a little late but I'm intrigued with a murder mystery set in a future with different rules and beings.

I place the ear bud in and I am taken to the Sextel 69.

In honor of National Masturbation Month 2012 I'm seeking out female friendly erotic podcasts. This one is more literary story than wham bam and that is just the way I like it.

Sometimes.

This is Heat Flash Erotica's "The Little Death," by Helen E. H. Madden.

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You Are Still A Young Man - Idiot!

I have to straddle a line between retaliation and just let it pass. I haven't told you the story yet. There is always a story. It is not apocryphal. It is tough out there in the brick and mortar world.

I was on the train. Young man and his friend enter the car as they start talking about girls. I have dubbed him Dumbstruck and his sidekick, Goofy.

So Dumbstruck was yacking on how he could not find any chicks. It was too early and the girls were not liquored up yet.  It was around 5pm so I could kinda see his dilemma. It was all I could do not to want to hit Dumbstruck upside the head.

Goofy co-sign with an understanding head bob to Dumbstruck's assessment of the situation.

Dumbstruck then continued conversing how he could find nothing but ugly women all day long. He had a need to find pretty girls.

I'm taking a quick look. The body seemed to be between 18-20 years of age. Rail skinny. Could not detect any form of rump on his behind. It looked to be all bone and not much of that. A strong draft beer in a tea cup could knock him down the street.

He wasn't ugly but I can't seen anybody rushing to lock lips on him. You couldn't do it anyway. The main feature was his mouth. Damn thing would not stop moving unless he was coming up for air. 

Goofy had a half pound more meat on his frame but his main attraction is that he doesn't say much.

Anyway, Dumbstruck goes on and on and on until a woman ask him "where he is getting off the train?' He responds "MacArthur Park."

She gets up and moves to the far end of the car.

Normal people might have taken that as a clue but Dumbstruck starts to harp on her that if she didn't like what he had to say "she shoulda put on her earphones". He rags on her for about three minutes about his right of freedom of speech and then goes back to his subject of choice.

Girls.

There are ugly women. There are old women.There are pretty girls.

These can be divided into the ones that will talk with you, the ones that won't (forget them, he told Goofy) and the ones that will do stuff. His job, as he sees it, is to locate that female objectified possessive noun and do what he wants.

Not his fault if they are stupid. 

You know just typing this I want to smack him for all the girl children on the planet. 

I didn't trust myself. I would have smacked him on behalf of the decent guys too.

I tried tuning him out. I had my mediation music. I'm trying to go to my happy place but Dumbstruck's voice carried louder than I could safely turn up the volume on my media player.

My understanding is that he was heading home to get ready to go to a party or series of parties where he could find and "do something" with some liquored up young girl.

Goofy was down widdit widdit. Non-verbally speaking.

Now, maybe it is me. I haven't been around a young man in a long time.  It is one thing to brag about your imaginary skills with the ladies.

It is another to announce to captive train audience that you need to have the object of your desire incapacitated before you can get anywhere.

I don't think you can be that drunk to let Dumbstruck touch you let alone "do something"  but I don't know what the heck is going on with young folks now days.

Eggad, I've crossed over. 

All I know is that by the time the clowns got off the train I mentally turned in my imaginary cougar card. I was thinking about guys in the 30s or 40s but it would take 20 plus years to clean out the dreck in that kind of head. At that rate I'd be 75.

No. If they are making the current crop of young men that stupid, that selfish, hate based and penile directed then whomever wants that slab of bones can have him. And Goofy too.


As for me, I gotta find better headphones.

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